Respite Care for Family Carers: How to Take a Break

If you look after a parent, partner or relative, you are not alone. According to the 2021 Census, there are 5.8 million unpaid carers in the UK. In England and Wales alone, 5.0 million people aged 5 and over said they provide unpaid care, about 9% of the population. Even in London, which has the lowest share of any region, it is 7.8%.

Most of those carers will tell you the same thing: the hardest part is not any single task. It is that there is never a break. Respite care is simply a way of giving you one, for a few hours, a night or a few weeks, while the person you care for is looked after properly.

Why breaks matter

Caring is often something people slide into. It starts with a weekly shop, then daily phone calls, then helping with a shower, and one day you realise you have not had an evening off in months. Because it builds up slowly, it is easy to miss how much it is taking out of you.

Taking a break is not letting anyone down. It is what makes it possible to keep caring for longer, and to do it well.

Signs you may be heading for burnout

Everyone is different, but these are common warning signs:

You feel tired all the time, even after sleep, or you are not sleeping well
You are more irritable or short-tempered with the person you care for, then feel guilty about it
You have stopped seeing friends or doing things you used to enjoy
Your own health appointments keep getting put off
You feel anxious whenever you are away, or dread going back
Small problems feel overwhelming
You are struggling to keep up with work or the rest of your family

If several of these sound familiar, it is a good moment to plan some regular respite, before things reach a crisis. If you are struggling with your mood or your health, talk to your GP too.

Respite options at home

Respite does not have to mean a care home stay. For many families, the easiest option is help at home, where the person you care for is in familiar surroundings with their own routines.

A few hours a week

A regular block of a few hours can make a big difference. For example, imagine a daughter who cares for her father most days. She books a carer for four hours every Wednesday afternoon. Her father has company, a walk and his tea, and she has time for her own appointments, a swim or simply a rest. At £20 an hour through Viola, four hours a week costs £80.

Regular sessions also mean the person you care for gets to know the carer, which makes longer breaks easier later on. If loneliness is part of the picture, our page on companionship care explains how visits can be shaped around company and outings.

Overnight respite

For many carers, broken nights are the hardest part. If you are getting up several times a night, even one or two nights of proper sleep a week can change how you cope. With overnight care, a carer stays in the home through the night, usually from 10pm to 8am, from £140 per night. Our article on when a parent needs someone at night goes into more detail.

Short-term live-in care

If you need a longer break, for a holiday, an operation of your own or simply to recover, live-in care means a carer lives in the home, supports your relative through the day and is there at night if something happens. Live-in care through Viola starts from £150 per day. The usual minimum is one month, but shorter stays can be considered case by case, and it is usually arranged within 5 days. The carer needs their own room.

Who pays for respite?

A carer’s assessment

If you care for someone, you can ask your local council for a carer’s assessment. It looks at how caring affects you, including your health, work and time for yourself, and what support might help. In some cases the council may help arrange or fund breaks. You can ask for one whether or not the person you care for has had their own needs assessment. Contact the adult social services team at their council.

Carer’s Allowance

If you care for someone for at least 35 hours a week, you may be able to claim Carer’s Allowance. In 2026/27 it is £86.45 a week. To qualify:

you must be 16 or over
the person you care for must get a qualifying benefit, such as Attendance Allowance or the daily living part of PIP
your earnings must be no more than £204 a week after tax, National Insurance and expenses

Attendance Allowance

If the person you care for is over State Pension age, check they are getting Attendance Allowance (£76.70 or £114.60 a week in 2026/27). It is not means-tested and can be used to pay for breaks. Our Attendance Allowance guide explains how to claim, and our article on paying for care at home in England covers the other routes.

Benefit rules and rates change, and claiming one benefit can affect others. This is general information, not financial or legal advice, and we are not financial or legal advisers. Check gov.uk or get free advice for your situation from Age UK, Citizens Advice or a local carers’ organisation.

Making respite work

A few things help the first break go well:

Start small. A short session while you are still in the house, or nearby, helps everyone get used to it.
Write it down. A one-page note on routines, likes and dislikes, medication times and who to call makes a big difference.
Keep the same carer where you can. Familiar faces matter, especially for someone living with dementia. See our page on dementia care.
Plan regular breaks, not just emergency ones. A break that is in the diary is far more likely to happen.
Use the time for you. It is tempting to fill it with errands. Try to keep some of it for rest.

How Viola can help

Viola is an introductory agency in London. We introduce families to vetted, self-employed carers for a few hours a week, overnight or live-in, and you choose the carer and agree the arrangements with them. If your regular carer is unavailable, we introduce a replacement. You can read more about how breaks can be arranged on our respite care page, or tell us what you need and we will help you plan a first break.

Frequently asked questions

What is respite care? Any arrangement that gives a family carer a break while the person they care for is looked after, for a few hours, a night or longer.

Can respite care happen at home? Yes. Hourly visits, overnight care and short-term live-in care all let the person stay at home.

How much is Carer’s Allowance in 2026/27? £86.45 a week, for people caring at least 35 hours a week who meet the other conditions.

What is a carer’s assessment? A free assessment from your council that looks at how caring affects you and what support might help.

How quickly can a carer be introduced? For hourly care, a suitable carer is usually introduced within 48 hours. Live-in care is usually arranged within 5 days.